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WPCNR ON THE AISLE. Theatrical Review by John F. Bailey. February 22, 2009 UPDATED :
What do you get when you pick up a Jewish Toad? The answer lies at the end of this crack review by your loyal reviewer, as soon as I finish this gin gimlet and whack this out, I’m already way past deadline.
Yes, realtors, Wall Streeters, homeowners, landlords, retirees and the newly unemployed — just when all is looking bleak: Westchester staring Mr. Depression in the face, Wall Street ganiffs down to their last billion, when even the Federal Reserve doesn’t understand credit default and derivitives (they’re swindles) and working people down to our last quarter to park in White Plains for 15 minutes — you need a good cruise — but, Oyvay, can’t afford it.
Well, the MeshuggaNuns – a habit all over the world for 26 years — are holding a laugh, chuckle, smirk-a-thon nightly at sea docking at Westchester Broadway Theatre.

All Aboard! The Mesuggah Nuns want to take you on a sea cruise! Reverend Mother (Bonnie Lee),(lower right) Sister Robert Anne (Deborah Del Mastro, Back row right) from good old Brooklyn USA, Sister Mary Paul (the world’s silliest nun, Jeanne Tinker, back row far left) and Sister Mary Hubert (Bambi Jones, front row left) bring you the innocent laughs of the past . That’s “Sarah Palin-sound-alike-look-alike” Cruise Director Melody Joy Lapidus (played beyond Tina Fey by Stephanie Wahl, second from left, back row), The Captain, (Ron Rogel) and Tevye (David Edwards, front Center) All Photo Actualities Courtesy, WBT, by John Vecchiola.
The humor is downright corny, delivering good old entertainment from days gone by when you went out looking for laughs, to get your mind off trouble, even when you knew it was silly and you didn’t have to think, just laugh til you plotz.
MOOOOOOO—-MOOOOOOOO! We’re setting sail on a sea cruise, aboard the S.S. Golden Delicious, on a “Faith of All Nations” ecumenical cruise. Unfortunately, the cast of Fiddler on the Roof the professional troop scheduled to perform for the cruise passengers, have all gotten seasick except for Dave Edwards who plays the lead Tevye (of Fiddler on the Roof).
But all is not lost – Cruise Director “WBT’s Sarah Palin” – at least Melody Joy Lapidus, the shapely Cruise Director, (wearing the tightest white skirt you’ll ever see, filled smartly by Stephanie Wahl), who looks like Ms. Palin, sounds like Ms. Palin, (and delivers a lot better) has good news for us.
For two hours nightly the rest of the cruise, the laughs are back – with food!
The laughs are corny, creaky, punny, preposterous, plays-on-words, endearing, charming, bad, naughty, delivered by comediennes in habits. You’ll chuckle, giggle, promise yourself you won’t laugh at these stupid, bad silly jokes. You’ll roll-your-eyes, groan at the clunkers, shake-your-head, I-don’t-believe-I’m seeing-this, I-don’t-believe-they-said-that, and laugh.
There’s jokes that fly, jokes that flop, old jokes, dumb jokes, smart jokes, double-entendres, whoppers, mentally excruciating puns. You’ll learn to laugh again, I guarantee it.
It’ll come out of you slow at first. Sometimes the cruise gets becalmed. Some of the numbers aren’t exactly Broadway anthems. But, never fear, the Little Sisters from Hoboken always have a joke or two, they always have a joke or two.
From the big ocean liner whistle to the nautical p.a. system announcements (if you’ve ever cruised, you know what those announcements sound like) and you can’t afford to go on a cruise this year – The Golden Delicious sets sail nightly with a floor show that is well, flooring.

After Sarah Palin, the Cruise Director, no, I’m sorry that’s Melody Joe Lapidus, played by Stephanie Wahl, informs us that the ship’s captain has prevailed on the Little Sisters to work with Tevye, the lead in the sea-sicked sidelined Fiddler on the Roof production played by David Edwards. The mismatched entertainers decide to adlib and put together a show for the ecumenicals in the imaginary cruise ship audience. The Sisters and Edwards, start this show of “the unexpected” with Anchors Aweigh. The Sisters mix their Catholic heritage with Tvye’s Jewish heritage to examine the nuances of both traditions. They explore guilt in the song “Contrition,” which brought laughter of recognition from the audience.

Something completely different: Sister Amnesia’s magic act, where JeanneTinker (center) channels Goldie Hawn so cleverly – winning over the real life audience, which is understandably somewhat skeptical after the bizarre spectacle of the nuns and Tevye waving flags to Anchors Aweigh. Ms. Tinker also pays homage to Karnak The Magnificent (the Johnny Carson creation) with a perfectly played “mentalist” schtick, in which she engages the audience.
Understanding the revue format.
True to the tradition of the revue entertainment format—the show lurches from gimmick to song – to introspection. Meshuggah Nuns hits with some bits—missing horridly with others – and occasionally draws laughs just from the bizarre directions this astonishing work – a work that Bialystock & Bloom might produce –rolls along.
There’s the Potchky Polka. There’s the optimistic self-parody by Sister Amnesia singing a country song, “I’m always missing the boat, but my ship keeps coming In”

Reverend Mother entertains as Sophie Tucker (the first great vaudeville star) where Bonnie Lee swings her ample hips – singing“My Fat is My Fortune” that drops the audience’s jaws at the flamboyance, the audaciousness, and her silliness. If you do not like silly, dopey humor that relies on the understanding that you are supposed to laugh, you may be disappointed.
The Little Sisters from Hoboken save the smorgasboard of a First Act with a spectacular number – they include a traditional “show within a show” a staple in any turn-of-the-century revue show. The Nuns and Mr. Edwards present a spoof of sea disaster – Das Boat.
Its preposterous staging brings down the house with dazed you-just-gotta-guffaw laughter that rings of incredulity at what they have just seen. You have to see it to believe it. The madcap zany Das Boat combines Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea, complete with nun-eating giant squid; The Poseiden Adventure with the boat well, you know, capsizing; and Jaws featuring a nun-connoisseur great white shark, and Titanic in one 10-minute sequence.
After being exhausted by this madcap deranged scenario reprising every sea disaster movie, I regretted not ordering one of Westchester Broadway Theatre’s new Luxury Desserts like Mocha Layer Cake among other custom prepared delicacies to regain my reviewer’s demanding demeanor.
The Das Boat sequence leaves you breathless, stunned, flabergasted, drained, dazed at the audacity, the stupidity, the over-the-top, over-do-it comedy reminiscent of a Jerry Lewis pratfall marathon that will have you wondering as you reach for the layer cake, what just happened here.
Das Boat rivals the man-eating plant scenes in WBT’s Little Shop of Horrors. Watching the nuns swim on stage will make an economist laugh.
On to the Second Act! There’s more!
The Second Act rolls along, lurches into amazing juxtapositions like any good revue – retaining just the feel of a “winged” show that the Sisters are making up with Tevye as they go along. It works!
Sister Robert Anne (Deborah Del Mastro) and Tevye (Edwards) deliver a charming duet A Love Like This, where each reminisces about how they love theatre: Tevye towards a girl he once knew, and Sister Robert Anne, Her Guy, (The Lord).
Next, it’s time for a little 40s! The Sisters spoof the Jewish American Princess image with an Andrews Sisters number, Three Shayna Maidels – that’s a real toe-tapper, synchronized in typical Andrews Sisters shuffle and spin, (including hairdos) where they describe the ideal mensch every shayna maidel is looking to find. This show gives all a great chance to brush up on your Yiddish!

Shades of Jackie Gleason’s Mother Fletcher’s Retail Shop!
Reverend Mother and Tevye offer some very funny duty free items especially Matzo balls which are celebrated by the Nuns singing Matzo Matzo Man.
Yes, in Mesuggah Nuns you see all of what you’d like to see, and some of what you’d rather not see, folks.
The message of this show is that laughter helps you get through life. This, by the way, WBT publicistette, Pia Haas says is the world’s most beloved traveling order, The Little Sisters of Hoboken — those missionaryettes of yucks have been on the road for 26 years– one of the most prolific and longest running musical revues in the world according to Ms. Haas liner notes provided the distinguished members of the press, (even the not so distinguished reviewers like yours truly.)
A remembrance of things past.
MeshugahNuns brings back a time of simpler entertainment at the first decade of the twentieth century that would get you through life for awhile – the revue that includes a little bit of everything to try and please everybody. With your prime rib, fish, or pasta, you get two hours of a trip down memory lane of old jokes and new (the Henny Youngman jokebook is liberally borrowed from), plus there’s a little ecumenical Laugh-In, complete with a “NunWall,” a little Loveboat, a little Henny Youngman on a rosarie.
It’s complete with my favorite, the puppet, Sister Mary Annette – manipulated adroitly, hilariously by the unpredictable Sister Amnesia, the Goldie Hawn “ditz-alike,” Jeanne Tinker. Sister Mary Annette is a raunchy puppet (through which Sister Amnesia lets her dark side out. This show Sister Mary Annette the puppet delivers a sultry Mae West singing Come on Up and See Me Sometime – complete with rim-shot patter.
Sample of Sister Mary Annette’s puppet deadpan humor: “Someone asked me if I smoked in bed,”
“I said, I don’t know, I never looked.”
MeshuggahNuns brings the Golden Delicious into port with a rousing funny second act, and as you disembark from the S.S. Golden Delicious – you’ll leave with the laughs and feel good for awhile. At least, until March 21 at the WBT when it makes way for Funny Girl. The Box Office is 914-592-2222. For more information, go to the WBT website, www.broadwaytheatre.com.
Now, ladies and gentlemen, as promised, before you disembark the SS. Golden Delicious…
What do you get when you pick up a Jewish Toad?
“Schwartz!”
Of course!
(Rim-shot!)